Are you mean to yourself?

Feb 13, 2024

Are you mean to yourself? 
Do you find yourself showing judgment more than grace to yourself? 

Your body looks terrible. 
You sounded like a fool.
You are a lousy boss.
You don't know what you are doing.
You aren't aging well.
You aren't that lovable.
You expect too much.
You are so behind. 
You aren't up to the task. 
Everyone thinks you are a fraud.
You are so undisciplined.
You are not capable of making the money you want to make. 
Why can't you follow through? 
This success probs won't sustain. 
You aren't qualified for much out there.
No one wants what you have. 

It's painful just typing these phrases, let alone thinking them.
And, yet ... I've heard them all.

My job as a coach is to make my dear clients aware of the sentences in their brain that they have practiced for so long they don't challenge them. They accept them. They believe them. 

If you relate and can think of a handful of thoughts you tell yourself about yourself I invite you to do something different this week. 

Answer this:
What is perfect about you?

Your smile.
Your laugh. 
Your masterful use of the label maker. 
Your follow through. 
Your problem solving abilities.
Your undeniable hospitality.
Your persistence.
How people love working for you,
The care you show others.
The second chances you offer others. 
Your lack of vanity.
Your grace. 
You "roll up your sleeves and jump in" approach. 
Your willingness to say what you think.
Your love for your child. 
Your willingness to have the difficult conversation. 
Your way with numbers.
Your masterful budgeting skills.

It's not magic. You don't stop thinking the other thoughts, but you do crowd them out a bit. 

Another idea:
When you catch yourself in judgment about you ask yourself how the opposite could be true.  You sounded like a fool. Hmmm... How could it be that I didn't sound like a fool, but rather someone willing to ask an obvious question.

You don't follow through. Well, maybe not in that area, but I always make sure my children are fed (follow through), bills are paid (follow through), reports are turned in on time (follow through), etc... 

Are you picking up what I am putting down? 

It is not outright dismissing the critical thought, it is playing with it. looking at it from a different angle, shifting away from it. 

You are it. 

You are whole. 
You are enough.
You are amazingly made.
Now... go find evidence. 

Big huge hugs, 


If you'd like support learning how to do this I'd love to help you.
There is such freedom on the other side of a life of judgment. 
How you do one thing is how you do everything so if you are full of self judgment you are probs judging others too. That creates disconnection from self and others. That does not lead to elevating, reaching your potential, leading from love.  One if life giving, one is life sucking. Which do you choose?